A thought just occurred to me: I only have one month of summer left. I leave for AU exactly one month from today, which means I'll be flying straight into the middle of winter. I think it's time to put together a "Summer Checklist."

• Get a tiger's blood sno cone
• Get a wedding cake sno cone
• Go to a Rangers game
• Spend a day at the pool
• Have a cookout (may be combined with the previous to-do)
• Go to a drive-in movie
• Go longboarding with my siblings
• Watch fireworks on the 4th of July

Here's to you, Summer!

It's looking very likely that I'll be leaving for Australia in a month. How insane. It's really happening.

As the reality sets in though I am tempted to be afraid. I'm experiencing the same emotions I felt in late 2010 as I prepared to leave for AU the first time; the same questions are bombarding my mind. Will I be as homesick as I was the first time around? Will I find a place to live, a place to work, an affordable car? Will God come through? Then I read Psalm 121 yesterday; written for pilgrims ascending to Jerusalem. And returned to it again this morning.

I look up to the mountains--

does my help come from there?

My help comes from the Lord,

who made heaven and earth!

He will not let you stumble;

the one who watches over you

will not slumber.

Indeed, he who watches over Israel

never slumbers or sleeps.

The Lord himself watches over you!

The Lord stands beside you as

your protective shade.

The sun will not harm you by day,

nor the moon at night.

The Lord keeps you from all harm and watches over your life.

The Lord keeps watch over you as

you come and go,

both now and forever.

I will most definitely be meditating on this as my departure date approaches. My God will not let me stumble; he himself watches over me! There is no room for fear in that truth.

If you're looking for a way to contribute and help me get back to Hillsong College in July, check out marymoscoso.bandcamp.com, where you can download my song, "Isaiah 40," for just $1! All proceeds go directly to my Paypal account. The recording is not perfect, the song is not perfect, but it is an honest and raw reflection of where I am right now, so if you're curious have a listen.

Trusting God is much easier said than done.

I'm only off $1,700 now. So close, yet so far.

Over these next two months I am praying for:

1) The money required to get back to AU (I am about $3K off at this point).

2) A new laptop for college (my iBook G4 is on its last leg).

You know the great thing about being changed by Jesus?

Being able to give grace to people because we have been given grace. It's like: I sucked, I was forgiven; I still suck a lot of the time, I'm still forgiven; you suck, I can forgive you and keep forgiving you because I sucked and still suck a lot of the time...etc. See the beautiful cycle of grace we're caught up in?

"The Lord is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love." Psalm 145:8

"The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18

Such sweet, sweet words--such a precious promise. One to cling to in times of upheaval, uncertainty; trial or pain. It is comforting to be reminded that he's near.

Today I am importing, storing, and deleting all the photos from my iPhone that were taken over the past two and a bit years. My life is literally flashing before my eyes and I am struck by the vast range of emotions I am experiencing as I watch the photos flick by on the screen. So much has happened since I left for Australia! Probably the greatest highs I have ever experienced and most definitely the deepest lows I have ever experienced. Honestly, and I'm sure you reading this can relate, it leaves me asking, "why me?" Why did those things happen to me? What did I do to deserve those incredible joys and those terrible lows? I don't suppose I'll ever fully know. Not in this life, anyway.

Paul says in Romans 8:28 that all things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to his purpose. I am sure that "those" is me and I pray that it is you, too.

At the end of the day, as I reflect on both hardships and blessings, I know I can rest and trust in my Heavenly Father. All I have to do (as it says in Deuteronomy 13:4) is simply "Obey his commands, listen to his voice, and cling to him."

A little "Surprised by Hope" as Easter rapidly approaches...

"Thy kingdom come, on earth as in heaven."

That remains one of the most powerful and revolutionary sentences we can ever say. As I see it, the prayer was powerfully answered at the first Easter and will finally be answered fully when heaven and earth are joined in the new Jerusalem. Easter was when Hope in person surprised the whole world by coming forward from the future into the present. The ultimate future hope remains a surprise, partly because we don't know when it will arrive and partly because at present we have only images and metaphors for it, leaving us to guess that the reality will be far greater, and more surprising, still. And the intermediate hope--the things that happen in the present time to implement Easter and anticipate the final day--are always surprising because, left to ourselves, we lapse into a kind of collusion with entropy, acquiescing in the general belief that things may be getting worse but that there's nothing much we can do about them. And we are wrong. Our task in the present is to live as resurrection people in between Easter and the final day, with our Christian life, corporate and individual, in both worship and mission, as a sign of the first and a foretaste of the second.

Ah, February 14th. The beloved/dreaded Valentines Day.

First of all, I'd just like to recommend that you brush up on your VDAY history (i.e. Wikipedia it). Secondly, everything that this day entails has got me thinking: love is a good thing. But making an idol out of being in love is not. Here's what Tim Keller has to say on the subject:

Making an idol out of love may mean allowing the lover to exploit and abuse you, or it may cause terrible blindness to the pathologies in the relationship. An idolatrous attachment can lead you to break any promise, rationalize any indiscretion, or betray any other allegiance, in order to hold on to it. It may drive you to violate all good and proper boundaries. To practice idolatry is to be a slave. It has always been possible to make romantic love and marriage into a counterfeit god, but we live in a culture that makes it even easier to mistake love for God, to be swept up by it, and to rest all our hopes for happiness upon it.

I will keep it short and to the point.

Dear friends, please keep a close eye on how you view and think on romantic love. Believe me, I want to find "Mr. Right," get married, and stay married to him for my whole life just as much as the next girl. But I have too often and for too long allowed it to consume my entire world--to truly become an idol in my life--and it only ever resulted in blindness, broken boundaries, broken promises, and bitter tears and sorrow on both sides. Join me: let's not place all our hope in that guy or girl. Let's not place all our hope in idealistic romantic love. Instead, let's together allow that internal idol to be torn down and replaced by the only one who is truly worthy of our worship, love, trust, and obedience. Because Jesus Christ will never--can never-- disappoint or fail us. He loves us: thoroughly and completely. Let's live our lives loving him back.

"Someone once said that if you want to know if there are rats in your basement, you shouldn't walk down the steps slowly, making a lot of noise. Then you will look around and not see anything. If you want to know what is really down there, you have to surprise it by running and leaping down the steps quickly. Then you will see a bunch of little tails scurrying away. And so it is under stress, in real life experience, that the true nature of our hearts is revealed."

More Tim Keller. I am finding this so very, very true in my own life. What comes out of you when you're between a rock and a hard place is who you truly are. I pray the gospel works deep into our hearts so it affects everything we think, feel, and do.

Tim Keller's Counterfeit Gods is seriously blowing me away this week. In chapter four, "The Seduction of Success," he lists things out pretty plainly:

"If you want God's grace, all you need is need, all you need is nothing... Jesus's salvation is received not through strength but through the admission of weakness and need."

What a comfort to know God doesn't work like we usually do. We don't have to come before him parading our status, achievements, and talents to get him to accept us into his family--to force his hand to move in our lives. None of that impresses him anyway! No, all we have to do is approach him humbly with open hands saying: "Lord, I've got nothing. I need you."

If you want God's grace and Jesus's salvation... "all you need is need, all you need is nothing."

A great truth I have been meditating on today:

2 Timothy 1:7: "for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control."

I don't have to fear anything in life! Instead, I can confidently fan into flame the gifts God has given me because he's already given me power, love, and the ability to utilize self-control through his Holy Spirit.

I can do this.

I finished "Simply Jesus" by Tom Wright tonight. Yay for finishing something. Gorgeous book. His closing words are ringing in my ears and I feel compelled to share them.

"This is what it looks like, today, when Jesus is running the world. This is, after all, what he told us to expect. The poor in spirit will be making the kingdom of heaven happen. The meek will be taking over the earth, so gently that the powerful won't notice until it's too late. The peacemakers will be putting the arms manufacturers out of business. Those who are hungry and thirsty for God's justice will be analyzing government policy and legal rulings and speaking up on behalf of those at the bottom of the pile. The merciful will be surprising everybody by showing that there is a different way to do human relations other than being judgmental, eager to put everyone else down. 'You are the light of the world,' said Jesus. 'You are the salt of the earth.' He was announcing a program yet to be completed. He was inviting his hearers, then and now, to join him in making it happen. That is, quite simply, what it looks like when Jesus is enthroned."

It's nights like these that remind me how much I really love my big, loud, crazy family.

My brothers have invented some modified version of frisbee/catch with a cork trivet (Jolie has volunteered to be their "runner"), Laney is in the kitchen making brownies with a friend, Mom and Papa are working together on finances (pff, grown up stuff), Emily is painting her nails (we LOVE the gel nail polish), and I'm just sitting back and watching it all happen.

God is good. So glad to be home.

A thought that occurred to me as I lay awake at 3 o'clock in the morning recently:

I trust God more than I feel the pain of my current circumstances.

Rather than attempting to take control of said circumstances in my own strength and force things in such a way as to make that pain go away temporarily, I have chosen instead to rest and trust in God's ability to work everything out in His timing and according to His good, perfect, and pleasing will.

Honestly, this hasn't always been the case for me. It is incredible to catch these occasional glimpses of the ways God is growing me up.

Needless to say I was able to fall asleep soon after with this comforting truth in mind.

To the faithful you show yourself faithful. Psalm 18:25